Inception Movie Review – An Exclusive Interview with Nolan
So after watching Inception, I was so amazed and mesmerized that I couldn’t resist setting up an interview with Mr. Nolan and Mr. DiCaprio. To be honest, the interview started off quite well, but then shit started going down. These are some of the excerpts of that exclusive interview!
LOLkein: Hey guys! What’s up? Just wanted to congratulate you on your amazing masterpiece movie, Inception!
Leo: You liked it?
LOLkein: Oh! I loved it. I thought it was complex and mind bending. That was some superb piece of writing…
Nolan: It was me!
LOLkein: Oh yeah! I mean you… of course sir. You are amazing! How did you think of this concept?
Nolan: Well, honestly most of my ideas came from India.
LOLkein: What! India? How?
Nolan: You see, when I visited India for the shoot of Batman Begins, I realized people in India were dreamers. They would literally dream about everything.
Whether they would be able to find a dustbin to throw a wrapper of an eatable or should they just throw it anywhere.
Or stuff like – will I will get to sit in this Virar Local?
Having Imaginary conversations of bargaining with local fruit sellers
It was extraordinary. So I thought, this seems interesting as a plot, why not develop this?
LOLkein: Are you shitting me right now? Cause I think you are!
Nolan: Look at me, my name starts with a NO. So No, I am not! I really did…
LOLkein: (cutting him off) Well, let’s say I believe you, but your movie isn’t just about dreaming really! It is about Dream-invasion right?
Nolan: (clenched fists) No, it’s about Inception!
LOLkein: Yeah! I get it, that’s the title of the movie. But doesn’t Inception really mean starting something new?
Nolan: Why you taking things literally? Did you really expect to see the delivery of Bruce Wayne in Batman “begins”?
LOLkein: LOL! I am sorry I didn’t mean to piss you off. Can you tell us what Inception and India had common?
Nolan: Yeah! So like I was saying before your sorry ass started interrupting me, I really did get a lot of concepts from India…Like lemme ask you something, do you dream regularly?
LOLkein: Yea I think, I do everyday!
Nolan: And how do you wake up?
LOLkein: I set an alarm
Nolan: What if the alarm doesn’t ring?
LOLkein: My mother KICKS me outta bed!…(after a pause)….Aaaaahhh
Nolan: See! Most Indians get kicked out of their dreams. Literally! So then I begin to add this eleLOLkeinnt to my movie.
LOLkein: What else?
Nolan: I wanted to add some thrill to the concept of dreaming and getting up. One day while I was walking past a building, I saw a security guard…SLEEPING! Can you believe that?
LOLkein (chuckling): Yeah! That’s quite common in India!
Nolan: He was literally dozing off. Kinda like a subconscious security.
LOLkein (exhaling): Aaaaaaah! I see what you did there!
Nolan: Now although it was none of my business I tried to wake him up, but he seemed like he just saw ‘The Dark Knight Rises. I had to KICK him like how your mother would do and BAM! Next thing you know, the panzy started saying some shit about having a Cobb.
LOLkein: You mean Khwaab! That’s hindi for dreams!
Nolan: Fuck my life! So anyways…I then proceeded to take an auto to my friend’s place. And the roads..
LOLkein: What about them?
Nolan: They defy gravity! I mean literally there are like potholes everywhere.
LOLkein: So you thought about plot-holes then?
Nolan: WHAT! No you dumbass! My movies don’t have plotholes. INDIA HAS POTHOLES. And then it struck me like the sound of Hans Zimmer. My movie needs to have something about Subconscious Security and Gravity defying infrastructure.
LOLkein: It’s strange that you mentioned Hans Zimmer now. I am curious, where did that legendary “GHO GHO” sound come from?
Nolan: What “GHO GHO”?
LOLkein: I mean that ear blasting sound you started the trend of and is being used in every other goddamn movie now?
Nolan: Oh that! Again India. Your train makes that sound. Hear for yourself.
LOLkein: As far as I know, we’ve always been told, the train makes “Chukk Chukk” sound in India
Nolan: What the fuck is that suppose to mean?
LOLkein (sarcastically): Sorry! Just going with the flow, something I learnt from your movie, memento.
Nolan: I should have killed you in the beginning of this interview then
LOLkein: Alright, moving on. I really loved how you devised such an interesting plot of dreams within dreams and still got the philosophy in it. How did you manage that?
Nolan: What philosophy?
LOLkein: The one about how life is nothing but a dream and how you need to take a leap of faith
Nolan: Honestly! I just make movies. People find the philosophies in them
LOLkein: That’s humble of you to say that, but people really found it fascinating that Inception was such a deep and mature film. Probably your best film to date.
Nolan (getting pissed off): So you me to say, you haven’t seen Interstellar!
LOLkein: Yeah I have seen that, but I thought since Leonardo is here I shouldn’t mention that!
Leo (indifferently): Yeah I am still here!
Nolan: How the fuck should he care?
LOLkein: He hates McConnaghay! Or whatever that guy is called. He literally stole the Oscar from him. If I was Leo, I would hate him too. Fortunately I am a Virgo!
Nolan (mumbling) whispered abuses
LOLkein: So moving further, tell me how do you manage to get the best acting out of every actor in Inception?
Nolan: It’s actually not that difficult. You see, all you have to do is cast the best actors there are. They all will start competing amongst themselves and make my job easier. I don’t have to beg them to act well. They know if they don’t, other guy is gonna steal that limelight.
LOLkein: Then why do you cast literally every actor from your Dark Knight series in this one?
Nolan: Next question please!
LOLkein: So you have an ambiguous end in this one as expected. Does the totem fall or keep spinning?
Nolan: This one’s a killer! Actually we ran out of film reel that time. Had to cut.
Nolan: No shitting! But that doesn’t mean I am gonna reveal what is in for that final take. You can keep guessing!
LOLkein: Why is Cobb’s wife, Mal, shown as an annoying female who cannot differentiate between dreams and reality?
Nolan (chuckles): Don’t all woman do?
LOLkein: haha! That’s true, but still…
Nolan: Simply put, I just wanted to continue the legacy of Leo, not being able to get a hold of his girls in the movies.
LOLkein: What do you mean?
Nolan: Look at Titanic, he gets drowned by the one woman he saves. Beach has him struggling between polygamy. Great Gatsby, we all know what happened there. Blood Diamond? Gets stranded by his so called well wisher woman. Wolf of Wall Street? Gets fuckin divorced. Shutter Island? Wife kills the kids man! Why should Inception be any different experience for him?
LOLkein: Poor Leo!
Nolan: C’mon he got an Oscar!
LOLkein: You think he could have been nominated for Inception at least?
Nolan: Why does everyone asks me that question?
Leo: I am still here!
LOLkein: Haha! Sorry Leo, it’s just been an honour talking to Mr. Nolan about Inception that I forgot you existed.
Leo: The Academy thought so too…
LOLkein: I think Inception is easily one of the greatest movies to have graced our cinema and it’s people like you who give hope to the movies.
Nolan: Thank you! And I am amazed, that people like you are reviewing movies in the pretense of interviewing me when you should already know it’s going all in your head.
Leo: That’s the Kick!
Confusious: What the fuck dude! You’ve been sleeping for an hour.
LOLkein: What? Where is everybody?
Confusious: Thoth’s gone out to get some lemon
LOLkein: You mean Limbo?
Confusious: Dude! You really need to watch Inception again!
– LOLKein, Over and out